lockdown – Samantha Tonge

Lost Luggage Publication Day! Blog post – Never Too Late

Sam Tonge — Thu, 22 Sep 2022 15:05:06 +0000

Today sees the publication of Lost Luggage, my second story with Boldwood Books.

I’m really excited to share it – it’s 72 year old Dolly’s story, a story about life always being full of chances, it’s never too late to turn things around.

When I was heading for my late twenties, recovering from a mental health illness and, at times, stressful university experience, I remember the panic I felt, deep inside, that I’d missed all my chances. I’d never have a career. Never find a partner. My illness had caused me to turn down many opportunities. After graduating I stayed inside for several months, rarely going out unless it was with my parents. I didn’t want to see anyone else. Or, rather, I didn’t want anyone to see me.

That lonely, isolating time is what inspired the story of Lost Luggage, along with Covid and the lockdowns so many of us, around the world, endured, spending months, years in some cases, stuck indoors.

Seventy-two year old Dolly, in particular, has a sense that it is all too late, that she’s missed her chances and settled for a life that is far from the dreams she harboured as a young woman. Her life fell apart when she was let down badly in her twenties and her plans for the future evaporated. As a result she moved in with her older sister and lived with her for fifty years. But then Greta left too and Dolly’s life fell apart again.

As a woman in my mid-fifties, I still have mental health issues, however I no longer experience that depth of hopeless despair because I now have the gift of hindsight. I realise that every year, whatever age you are, brings the possibility of following your dreams, of things turning around and a trough becoming a peak.

Take my career. I didn’t get published until my mid forties and I know writers who’ve got their first deal a couple of decades after that. And then there are my drinking issues. For a long time I’d known I had a problem and it going full-blown was always *in the post* as addicts say. That post arrived big time when I got published and in 2016 I finally went into treatment. So it wasn’t too late for me, I got there eventually and now I’m almost six years sober.

The key to finally achieving your goals? It’s facing your fears. Forcing yourself to do the most difficult thing. And accepting help from people to do so. For me… in my twenties it was a matter of undergoing therapy and forcing myself out to meet friends, and getting a job. To get published, I had to brace myself and send out work, with support from fellow writers. I received over eighty rejections but kept going. And to get sober, with the support of my husband and children I faced the scary prospect of a treatment programme with other addicts. It was one of the hardest processes I’ve ever been through, but when you reach a point where your situation feels as if it can’t get any worse, what have you got to lose?

With the encouragement of her neighbours retired Leroy and eleven year old Flo, Dolly realises she, too, must push herself out of her comfort zone. When she bids on a piece of lost luggage and finds a notebook inside it, containing a Year of Firsts, the answer has landed in her lap.

Dolly must undertake these challenges herself – with a little help from her friends.

Young Heads On Old Shoulders

Sam Tonge — Tue, 13 Oct 2020 07:56:05 +0000

The story of The Winter We Met revolves around the closure of Willow Court care home and how that threatens the residents’ beloved Christmas party.

When I wrote this book I wanted to show how the elderly still live vibrant lives that matter and don’t fit the negative stereotypes. I think it’s easy to forget this sometimes, as wrinkles or health problems associated with ageing can hide the still vital personality inside – especially in a modern society that is so obsessed with a youthful body image. I’m continually inspired by the older generation.

My much missed mother, for example, followed many hobbies during her life – reading, drawing, pottery – and continued such pursuits in her retirement, along with volunteering. My octogenarian father has recently embraced the online world and now messages and sends Gifs, and Skypes as well as anyone. And his mother, right into her late eighties, walked around in high heels despite problems with her hip, and wore flamboyant clothes and red lipstick, enjoying an enduring interest in fashion.

More than ever retirement isn’t about fading into the shadows, many pensioners pursue vital, fulfilling lives, continuing to learn new skills, mixing with friends, enjoying hobbies, helping their families. Like everyone else, they still have dreams. Still fall in love. Still enjoy sex. And this shouldn’t be a surprise.

I truly believe the words of George Bernard Shaw:

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

Several famous older people hugely inspire me. David Attenborough who is in his 90s still follow his passion for the natural world and fighting climate change, demonstrating that it’s never too old to make a difference.

And I’ve long admired Joan Collins’ attitude about ageing:

“Growing old is something you do if you’re lucky”

I’m in my fifties now and sure, it’s a shock sometimes to put my glasses on and really *see* my face in the mirror, wrinkles and all. But in a way I’m fond of the flaws – each one tells a story. For example due to getting shingles during lockdown I know have trail of pock marks down my forehead – and in the future I’ll look at them and they will remind me of the tough times in 2020 and how we all got through.

The pay off of time passing is – hopefully – a little wisdom and contentment. I’m much happier than I was thirty years ago and now have a boxful of tools to live by – mindfulness, gratitude, kindness – that I’ve gained through tough life experience. Challenging as it has been, I wouldn’t swap that any day with the vigour of youth.

I really feel I’m getting to *know* who I am now and because of that I care a little less what people think of me – as long as my conscience is happy, so am I. This has been a huge gift and I’m excited for what else I will discover if I’m lucky enough to see future big birthdays go by.

It was a joy to create the characters living in Willow Court – none of whom care very much for other people’s opinions!

Alf the conspiracy theorist

Flamboyant actress Pan, who’s a little confused.

Down-to-earth avid reader Alice who looks out for everyone.

Smart, uptight, business-minded Glenda.

Movie buff and family-orientated Betty, suffering from dementia

Former fireman Fred, a jolly good sort.

I’m thrilled that so many readers have loved this aspect of The Winter We Met.

The carers play an important part in the story too. Before lockdown I feel as if care homes were only in the papers if there was a case of abuse or neglect. But this pandemic has shown has just how truly caring the majority are, real homes from home, run by staff who’ve gone above and beyond during this difficult time.

And that’s why The Winter We Met is dedicated to those superstars

Lessons from Lockdown

Sam Tonge — Mon, 22 Jun 2020 07:30:20 +0000

It’s been three months now since the country went into lockdown and working through this pandemic has taught me several unexpected things about my author career…

I realise that my writing is a hugely important constant in my life. It’s got me up in the morning. It’s kept me busy. My latest work in progress, and watching it unfold, has given each day a sense of normality and continuity. It has been a distraction from the chaos and tragedy happening around me locally and in the world. I’m incredibly grateful for this. Writing is my friend. It’s given me a purpose and passion at this very challenging time.

More than ever I respect the romantic comedy genre. During lockdown my thirteenth book, The Summer Island Swap has been published and reviewers have kindly said what a welcome escape the story is from our current difficult situation. I’ve had comments like these before about my books, as other romcom authors will have, from readers who’ve been having a hard time and found that such stories give them a momentary break. There is a certain snobbery out there towards romance books but lockdown has shown clearly how much people need fictional escapism and happy-ever-afters when the real world is a scary place.

Writer’s block – I’ve always written through it before and have done so again these last months. When the pandemic was unfolding in the UK, in late March, and throughout April and May, I had to write my Christmas 2020 novel. I soldiered on, putting finger to keyboard, telling myself that was the main thing, the rewrite could sort out any mess. But this time I discovered writer’s block on a whole new level. Yes, I eventually achieved the wordage I wanted but I felt blocked when it came to working out the structure of the overall plot arcs and the pace. With daily mortality rates and Covid 19 guidelines appearing minute by minute on social media, with daily worries on a personal level, I just couldn’t focus. So I guess lockdown has shown me that writer’s block isn’t as simple as I once thought. It’s not just about not being able to increase that word count. It’s also about not being able to get your head around the big things like developing character and expanding the themes.

And leading on from this I appreciate my agent more than ever. I’ve always thought she was amazingly supportive, especially with the editorial support she offers, but recently I’ve felt I need it on a different level. Her fresh pair of eyes has been able to offer perspective on the bigger aspects of the story and she’s given me confidence in what I’ve written. Between us I feel we’ve really been able to shape that sticky first draft into a book I’m so excited about and can’t wait to share in October!

I’ve also appreciated her support around the fact that due to lockdown, I struggled to meet my deadline and needed her to ask for it to be pushed back a bit. All the editors I’ve ever worked with have been brilliantly flexible about this but still, it’s been great, during lockdown, to have one less thing to worry about.

Authors sometimes ask me about my view on agents. I find mine indispensable.

Finally, I’ve always thought of myself as a bit of a hermit writing from home, reading, watching Netflix in the evenings… however during lockdown I’ve been surprised at just how much I miss meeting up with my writing friends in real life. A group of us have coffee together in Manchester once a month and haven’t been able to do that for ages. Plus the Romantic Novelists’ Association is celebrating its Diamond Anniversary this year and has had to cancel various events, including a special summer party in June. I last saw my romance friends at an awards ceremony at the beginning of March and had such a lovely time. Social media is great but there’s nothing quite like a face to face chat where you can discuss things you might not want to share online, and have a good-humoured chat about the latest ups and downs of your career.

To sum up, due to lockdown, I’m more grateful than ever for my writing and the people connected to the industry who support it – my agent, my fellow authors, the readers who give feedback.

It’s been a horrendous time so any positives are welcome. And I end this post sending my thanks to keyworkers and love to everyone who’s been struggling.

Writing in Lockdown – 5 Top Tips

Sam Tonge — Thu, 16 Apr 2020 08:58:07 +0000

It is an understatement to say that these are strange times. Lockdown around the world has challenged so many things such as the economy and people’s mental health; it’s made us even more aware of what heroes the NHS and key workers are, going out to their jobs on the frontline. I consider myself extremely lucky that I can work at home – that I’m not under threat of losing my career; that by doing my job I’m not threatening my health. I feel enormous gratitude for that.

This doesn’t mean to say that authors aren’t facing challenges. Especially those of you looking after ill relatives or home-schooling young children – or for whom writing isn’t your full-time work and you are trying to juggle the demands of another job from home. Hats off to you all.

We’re sensitive souls and in my experience turmoil in real life heavily impacts on creativity. And I speak personally, having a deadline at the end of May that I’ve got to meet and am struggling with.

So here are my five tips to keep working.

Firstly – and most importantly – be kind to yourself. By this I mean don’t beat yourself up if you miss a daily word count goal. We’ve got to get through this lockdown as best we can. As the UN General Secretary said, it’s the biggest challenge for the world since World War Two. So don’t consider yourself a failure if you are slipping behind. We all have less head space at the moment. Other priorities have come to the fore.

Secondly – take it one day at a time. Try not to look too far into the future. I have a deadline for my Christmas book on the 25th May. In all honesty I’m not 100% sure I will make it. The best way I can cope is not to think about that. I just look at each day. See what I can achieve. Do my best to congratulate myself that slowly the word count is mounting up.

It reminds me of when I got help in 2016 for my mental health. I used to worry about the future and past way too much. The man who got me sober told me off for thinking I had a crystal ball. Treatment taught me there is absolutely no point in wondering and worrying about what might be. There is no point in trying to second-guess when lockdown might end. There is no point having sleeping nights about whether you will hit your deadline. Worrying won’t alter what happens. So just keep ploddng on, little by little, in the present moment.

In fact a lot of what I learnt to get sober and in AA is helping me enormously.
One day at a time. Keep on keeping on. Accept the things you can’t change. Keep it simple.

Thirdly – structure your week. Even though my Christmas deadline is pressing, and I have promotional work to do for my summer novel, The Summer Island Swap, coming out on the 7th May, I do not work at weekends, apart from a little social media. I bake. Read. Watch movies. My family and I dress up for dinner on a Saturday to try to make the weekend feel different (this means I wear jeans instead of joggers!) As a result I feel really fresh Monday morning and keen to carry on with my project.

I also try to think of my working week as having some sort of structure – Tuesday morning I do a food bank drop-off, Thursday night I do the NHS clap, Monday and Tuesday evening I watch EastEnders… it may sound silly but thinking of the week in that way gives me a degree of normality and stops the whole of lockdown just looking like an endless void.

And make sure you take that daily exercise. A cycle ride. A walk in the sunshine – or rain! That gives your days structure as well.

ROUTINE, ROUTINE, ROUTINE is proving to be my saviour. I listened to the dawn chorus the other morning. It struck me that whatever happens the day before, the birds still get up at the same time and sing their song. And that’s what I try to do. No lie-ins or late, late nights.

Fourthly – just get anything down. This attitude has REALLY helped me forge ahead with the first draft. I’ve found it so difficult to concentrate and hold the plot lines together, everything seems muddled in my head what with catching snippets of Coronavirus news on social media… so even if I think it’s rubbish, I type, type, type. THERE IS ALWAYS THE REWRITE to pull everything together.

Finally – take regular breaks from the key board. Perhaps spend longer than usual preparing a delicious lunch. Ring a relative or friend – you’ll both feel better. Treat yourself whether that is with a daytime soap or a read with coffee and biscuits. And take an extra long break if you’re really struggling more than usual. Yesterday I just couldn’t concentrate after a few hundred words, so I did some baking, rang a relative and took a walk. And there’s no shame in that. Tomorrow is another day.

I’ll always think of my 2020 Christmas novel as the one I wrote during lockdown. From that point of view it will have been the hardest I’ve ever written. Yet, at the same time, I’m grateful for the escape it is offering me and us writers are lucky to have that outlet. More than ever I’ve enjoyed disappearing into the cosy festive environment I’ve created.

Best of luck with your projects and spending part of the days ahead in your fictional worlds. I know it’s hard but you can do it and start by being kinder to yourself